We talked about them for a while and realized that they probably had no idea what they were doing wrong. We thought, Wouldn’t it be fun to write a book for them, telling them what they are doing wrong and how to fix it?

So we did.

Presenting: “How to Get Your Wife to Act Like a Porn Star” by Alice and Jane Cash. The book is available on Amazon and we are terribly giddy about it. Our little book is divided into 30 days of lessons such as “Do the fucking dishes” and “The clit instruction guide”.

The best news? We are giving a copy away to one of you guys!

To enter the giveaway, leave a comment telling me what you think a book of this sort should include. For extra entries, retweet this post and share it on Facebook. You may also join our Facebook fan page. You can get up to 4 entries per person. Just let me know in the comments section which type of entries you did. The drawing will be held at random.org and will take place on Friday, May 28th, so enter now!

Seriously. We all know someone who desperately needs this book.

The way to keep abortion down is to teach women in America to not have sex before marriage.

- Melvin “Dusty” Woolsey

You can read the entire post here.

Wow.

Dr. Mr. Woolsey,

I’m not sure that I understand your plan to “keep abortion down” correctly.  Exactly how do you propose to “teach women in America not to have sex before marriage?”  Church, perhaps?  Maybe a cult-like brainwashing program of some sort? Chastity belts for the ultimate in male control?

While I am sure that what you are intending is the “saving” of unborn babies, your methods are quite stupifiying.  Since you did not mention anything about teaching males not having sex before marriage, I can only assume that you are supporting the right of the red-blooded American male to have sex with as many sheep/pigs (rest in peace P-Pie) as he likes, since that is the only option that you are offering.

If what you intended to say was that we could avoid abortions by having all members of society abstain from sex before marriage, I am sure that you realize the absurdity of your plan by now, as you must be at least a hundred years old.

You seem to be implying that a woman who is married would never want to have an abortion.  You must be a real ladies man to have such a valuable insight into the female mind.  You should probably write a book.

Good luck with your “teaching women” plan.  I wish you the best in all your ignorant endeavors.

love and kisses!